Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Baby Fever

A while back I wrote that I went to the doctor because my husband and I decided we wanted to start trying to have a baby, but I was concerned because I am very irregular. Well, after a quick blood test we found out we do have a issue. I have been diagnosed with something called Poly Cystic Ovary Syndrome. Which, basically mean I have high blood sugar and testosterone levels in my body causing me to have little to no ovulation's a year. I have a doctors appointment on the economy here in a few weeks to find out if I have cysts on my ovaries or not, either way PCOS is not curable but is treatable. Right now I am on some pills to regulate my sugar levels which is supposed to cause my periods to start, but no luck so far. I am pretty heart broken, I really want a baby. My husband is deploying next June so when we decided to start trying he would have been here for the first 4 months or so of the babys life then been deployed. Well now 3 months later he probably wouldnt be here for the birth! Now I'm scared to even go through with it! But I still really want to have a baby and I don't think I want to wait until he gets back!!! We have been through so much in the last few months and I really don't want to give up on having a baby quite yet. The next step is taking Clomid, which will help make my eggs larger and more frequent....which gives me the possibility of TWINS!! Oh my! Wish me luck. :-)

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

Domestic Violence

I grew up around domestic violence and I don't remember much about my life before I was 15 years old, I blocked it out, for good reason though. I just dont get it! I don't get why women stay with a man who beats her. Why do you want to put makeup on or wear glasses to cover your bruises? Why do you want to make excuses for him? Why? Whats worse is the mothers that allow there husbands to beat the living crap out of them while there child is watching, learning and thinking this is how it is, this is how I will be treated or will treat some one some day. Don't you want to be your self, make mistakes and know that your husbands just going to laugh and say "oh hunny" instead of fearing where and when hes going to lash out at you next. I just got some new neighbors and they only got married because she got pregnant and figured a baby can make everything okay and they will make it work. This may work sometimes but not always. They fight constantly! He blew threw all there money on booze and hotel rooms before her and her son moved out to Germany. He was OBVIOUSLY cheating on her, and she knows it! Yet, shes still with him. If she say no to XXX then he forces her, pins her down and does his thing, she has bruises from him pinning her down! Can you believe that?!?! Her way of dealing with all this is to cut everything out of his life, no drinking (okay I can see this), no smoking, no fun! She has cut everything out of his life and is controlling every move he makes. Of course he is going to sneak around and do things behind your back, but then she finds out confronts him and then the fighting begins!! I just do not get it!! I had a friend that her husband was a a** also and would beat her and stuff would he would get drunk and she always made excuses for him, he even pushed me at on point! He had a history of violence and I have never really liked him, but thats besides the point. I will never understand because my husband rarely even yells at me...I have to really push him to even do that! All I can say is I have it good and I LOVE my husband!! Has anyone been a abusive relationship? Does anyone have any advice I can give her? She confides in me and tells me these things but then brings her husband to MY house. Am I just supposed to smile at him and say come on in, when all I want to do is rip him a new one and tell him to get the hell out of my house!

Friday, July 17, 2009

Update

It has been FOREVER since I posted! Not a whole lot has been going on. The last time I posted I was trying to decide what to do, go to my sisters graduation, my besties wedding, or a long overdue honeymoon. Well, shortly after I posted it my amazing little sister myspaced me and told me to take her out the equation and then choose, she said do what I want and that I better show up to her highschool graduation! I talked to my hubby and he told me to go to Carlas wedding. We had a quick and simple wedding so we plan to renew our wedding vows so all of our friends and family can be there to see it and we will just go on our honey moon after that. So, with all that said I went to Carlas wedding! I am very glad that I did. I just got back form the states a few days ago and loved everyminute of being there. I started off by seing the 3 loves of my life Emily, Madilynne, and Kaydence (my neices)! The first weekend was Carlas bachlorette party which was a BLAST, of course not drama free but we had a blast in the end. Then I spent the next couple weeks preparing for the wedding....it was very stressful and reminded me of why I eloped! It was all worth it in the end the wedding was beautiful and the only thing missing was my husband. One thing I did do when I was there was get a tattoo with my little sister and Ashley, I hurt REALLY bad, but I love it! I got Live.Laugh.Love on the top/side of my right foot. Here are some pictures from my trip. Well, my computer wont let me upload very many so heres just a few.